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Before I began this latest series of medical procedures, I was told "Ha, ha, ha, ha Mr. Kendall, you'll lose 7 - 10 pounds and keep your hair."Lie number 1, I did not keep my hair. I look like an out-of-shape Sordidman now. The look doesn't quite work. (Oh, but you look at least ten years younger now....who do these people think they are kidding?)
Lie number 2, I have gained a 10 - 12 pounds.
Take yesterday. I woke up at 6:30 a.m. and was ready for breakfast. Breakfast in bed sounded good to Mrs. bwk, too, so she declared she would have whatever I was having. So I called a place close by that specializes in fresh, made-to-order real food and unwittingly ordered two breakfasts consisting of six-egg omelettes, three pieces of bacon and three pieces of sausage in each (along with various garden goodies) and what seemed like a five-pound bag of hash browns. I could serve three people full plates here at home with what they used for one serving.
So I ate about half and put the rest away. Later that day I decided to cook a lean pork roast on the grill real slow. The smell of that roast was so much I went back in and ate the rest of my breakfast. The roast is still sitting untouched in the `fridge. I gave Cinco and Mayo a few little slices.
Then today I am reading an article about British soldiers in Basra. They are drinking milk shakes and eating fish and chips. Milk shakes? Fish and chips? So off in the car I go to another local place notorious for fresh food and monster portions, and now I have a huge dinner cooling down in the kitchen. Nothing says health quite like fried food with lots of batter. At least I didn't order a milk shake.
Somebody had better stop me. I apparently can't stop myself.
I'd love to type more, but I need to go stuff my face. Me-no-me-na....dooo do doo do doo.
Follow Ups:
Hope you're OK!
I sent you some!
****
If I had more money I'd soon be broke...but I'd have more LPs!
I didn't want to brag in front of everyone. I have discovered that hair has increased Diane's running speed by more than double! All I have to do is chase her with it.
you like cheese fondue. Try it with apples and bread. Followed by exercise.
Back in early January, my doctor - that five foot tall black belted wench, said I needed to watch my fat/cholesterol intake a bit more closely because the levels were sneaking up a bit.
So every fricken thing I buy in the way of groceries gets the inspection. If it says anything more than 3-4 grams of fat per serving I don't take it home.
I haven't had french fries or potato chips (my two favs) in months. No nifty big mild Italian sausages, no bacon, portion sizes down by a third, I'd already stopped drinking alcohol (notice I didn't say "quit" drinking - I ain't no quitter!) so there's no beer. I don't drink soda pop or coffee anyway so there's no issues there.
Meat is lean, lean, lean and even then is browned first and the fat (usually hamburger fat) is drained off.
Only olive oil to cook with and then from this nifty sprayer bottle I bought.
Fat-free salad dressing. No skin on the chicken.
And so on and so forth.
I'm down a whole 2kg.
Whoooooooooooo!You would think there'd be a better showing. I'm eye-balling taking the bike out. My knees are putting up some vociferous objections to that!
Damn - I hear ya Bruce. I do indeed.
jac - desperaudio
But hey, there's a ream of paper there! I wonder how that tastes? ;~)Jac, you have to ingest some of that stuff that is bad for you sometimes. You just have to. Give yourself one day per week to indulge in those sausages. Go ahead. No one needs to know but us.
Those male nurses will go ga-ga over you! You'll be out cold, but if your bottom hurts later you'll know they tried to get you pregnant.
****
If I had more money I'd soon be broke...but I'd have more LPs!
...
:-)
DevillEars
nt
________
"Occasionally we list eccentrically, all sense of balance gone."
..
DevillEars
nt
:-)
Mike "use your ears" Z
Gotta keep thy strength up, tha knows...
Stop it!
Stop it, huh? I wonder if that works?
I'm in tears.
________
"Occasionally we list eccentrically, all sense of balance gone."
The hair will ...probably grow back at some later date. You can always TRY to go on a diet (also at some later date...) if the weight is a problem.Let's just have confidence them doctors are better at ...doctoring...than...reckoning how each individual is actually going to behave during certain treatment(s). That's behave, not react. I've always thought a hearty appetite is a sign of good things, minus any possible tape worm factor.
All things in moderation is also a good thing, but SOME of these good things you can catch up on...later, dude.
6:30 AM?...YIKES!!!! For me, THAT would be a problem...
"I always play jazz records backwards, they sound better that way"
-Thomas Edison
drag my butt across the carpet, but the day is still relatively young. ;~)
until the worms get bigger.
There's a new sound
The newest sound around
The strangest sound that you have ever heard
Not like a wild boar or a jungle lion's roar (ROAR!)
It isn't like the cry of any bird (Ah-ooga Ah-ooga)
But here's a new sound
It's deep down in the ground
And everyone who listens to it squirms
Because this new sound
So deep down in the ground
Is the sound that's made by worms
(grx nk grx nk brn brn brn rm rm rm)REPEAT SONG
REPEAT SONG AGAIN
REPEAT SONG STILL AGAIN and
REPEAT SONG YET AGAIN
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