I used to sit in my office gazing at the birdies and green lawns, imagining I was chasing a naked Sofie Vergara around. But then my wife started pulling into the parking lot, and I had to quit in order to minimize the risk of being caught. Then I took up yelling and beating on inanimate objects. That worked great until the day I was getting ready to hurl a stapler at a wall. When I pulled my arm back getting ready to give it a big toss, it came unhinged and I almost knocked myself out.
For a brief period of time I tried venting by complaining to work associates about whoever keeps pissing all over the floor of the executive washroom. That was very shortlived, so I took to acting like a 19-year old on Audio Asylum. That proved to be a success for a number of years, but I found as time went on and you form relationships and even do business together, I was being drawn back into my adulthood act.
So now I usually just go home and do my usual routine while imagining that my wife is a naked Sofie Vergara.
But today I started wondering if my adulthood act was really much of an act at all. To quote a caller to a radio talk show today.....
"All dem people in Washington ain't worth the powder it'd take to blow `em all to hell. Dey think dey know the Constooshun? All show `em what the Constooshun is, ekspeshully the ones dat want my guns. Dats what matters and dats how I'm votin."
If that's an adult, I have no grasp of the concept.
