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In today's email flotsam:
THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY
"THOMAS COOK VACATIONS" FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS:
1. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."
2. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallarta to close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time -- this should be banned."
3. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food."
4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price."
5. "The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room."
6. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow."
7. "They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax."
8. "No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared."
9. "Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers."
10. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish."
11. "The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun."
12. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair."
13. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends' three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller."
14. "When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners."
15. "We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning."
16. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."
17. "I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."
18. "My fiancee and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."
BE AWARE ....
THEY WALK AMONG US ...
and THEY VOTE!!!!
Follow Ups:
in windy, cold, foggy 44 degree weather because they are in "California" in June.
And they are legion.
Certainly some have complained that the sun was out and seen in the brochures?
"The coldest winter I ever saw was the summer I spent in San Francisco."
- This quote has been attributed to Mark Twain.
Well, whowever actually said it nailed it.
"Once this was all Black Plasma and Imagination" - Michael McClure
...to get home. This seems unfair."
Well, move to America then.
Later Gator,
Dave
We have too many idiots here already, like gun range owners letting 9 year olds shoot Uzi's.
That's the scary part.
I'm more scared of the fact that they are allowed to breed.
They paid just 10 pounds a head to come here, mostly on cruise liners. Post-war and well into the 1960s and 70s.
And when they got here, more than half began complaining, at the dumb level of the nonsense you listed.
We coined a by-word for them ......
"Whingeing Poms"
It is delicious to know that they still make them like that. 'Oxygen thieves' the LOT of them.
Mind you having served with the Tommies, I know that they are not ALL like that but it is an identified group.
My son's Megan, who was once a POM, is not like that. We have checked, often!
JBTW there are a class of American tourists who are memorably stupid. My BILaw when in Florence, (Tuscany, Italy ;-)) met one who complained that he couldn't find a McDonalds!!!! Why f$#@!g travel at all, eh?!
It is possible Australia has bred a few of them as well, and we do travel, among the most travelled of nations. Go have a dig around on the world-wide-wank and see if there are 'awful Aussie' tales.
But you already have two here!? ;-)!
Warmest
Tim Bailey
Skeptical Measurer & Audio Scrounger
...on the point where the four states and two Indian nations meet (note that they handed me an iPad to do it and they had to show me how to use the damn thing, too). Then they offered to take our picture and the reverse was done (with our cameras). I hope that they enjoyed their journey. Another couple came all the way to Farmington, NM just to attend the national insulator show; they had been to Springfield, OH a couple of years ago for the same reason. Now, that is dedication to the hobby! So, yes, they do get around.
Four corners:
Neat country also:
Later Gator,
Dave
Pomegranate, pink faced? Depends on who you ask. Prisoner of Mother England?
Australian English term for Any English person, often extended to the Welsh and Cornish. The Irish are 'Micks and Orangemen pricks', and the Scots are just ..... the Scots!
"And when I get to London, I do, I do
I'll go down to Trafalgar Square
and say to old Lord Nelson,
get stuffed, get stuffed,
you one-eyed Pommy bastard!!!!!" avec rallentando on the last word!
Yes, it has a tune, though what it's called I don't know, but I could sing it for you!
:-)!
Warmest
Tim Bailey
Skeptical Measurer & Audio Scrounger
the Scots are known as 'Jocks' in the UK while the Welsh are Taffys and the Irish Micks or Paddys.
In return these nations tend to refer to the people from south-eastern England as 'C**ts'.
Which seems fair considering the history.
...YouTube so we can all enjoy it. Hmmm, I would even go on Facebook for that.
Later Gator,
Dave
Hey, I know nuthin'.
Especially one's served at cellar temperature. No not warm, but COOL, and not filling-shrinking freezing.Lovely with curries and anything chillie hot.
Don't hate Lagers, but ...... most mainstream Aussie Lagers are plain awful. Not bitter, too sweet. Most places serve their beer way too cold
XXXX by Castlemain is a good main-stream lager.
I plain love Pilsner Urquell.
Warmest
Tim Bailey
Skeptical Measurer & Audio Scrounger
Edits: 08/29/14
Pilsener Urquell is one of my three favourite beers!
The other two are Budweiser (the one made in Budovice, formerly known as Budweis) and Einbecker Urbock.
Also Weihenstephan make a decent wheat beer but so they should, they've been practising for the last 1200 years.
So there's a lot of overpriced crap about, no?
IF you don't like the various British ales nor the Belgian ones? You still might want to see if you can find Coopers Sparkling Ale in a decent bottleoh in London, or their Pale Ale.
Your (UK) Beer Hunter, Michael Jackson calls their Sparkling Ale - 'the champagne of beers'. You _can_ serve a Coopers ale a little colder then British ales. There are two ways to pour it, both are the same but you can also turn the bottle to distribute the remains of the yeast cells beforehand.
Personally, I don't think it enhances the yeastiness which is a quite strong flavour component anyway, and it ruins the lovely copper colour. It is very well hopped, too! Tassie hops.
Not quite as strong as some very strong British Ales.
All of Coopers ales (bar one new) IIRC are made on lees in the bottle, and sold with the lees still in the bottle. No riddling / remuage and degorgement is applied.
Warmest
Tim Bailey
Skeptical Measurer & Audio Scrounger
Well I do live in the UK however I am german born and bred so by default I grew up with and generally prefer lager. Unfortunately Red Stripe (jamaican and brewed here under license) is the only drinkable lager produced in the UK. Even the british-made licensed Löwenbräu is rubbish but then again I do not rate the german original very highly either.I do like british ales but it very much depends on the pub which is serving it.
You might like Ale X in pub A but then in pub B the very same Ale X could well be horrid.
They all seem to be less than stellar from a bottle or even a can (the horror!).
Btw technically wheat beers are ales, not lagers so they do make some decent ales in Germany.Not sure if you know that but 'Ur-' means original. Hence Pilsener Urquell was the very first Pils while Einbecker Urbock is the bock from which all other bocks were derived.
The Bavarians liked Einbecker so much they headhunted one of their brewmasters centuries ago and the rest is history.
Similarly stout is a London invention which tickled the taste buds of the irish while falling out of favour in London.
Edits: 08/31/14
The Coopers being bottle conditioned are far better.
Do try them!
Warmest
Tim Bailey
Skeptical Measurer & Audio Scrounger
I will if I ever find it. ;-)
When I lived in London in the 80's I switched to real ales almost immediately because of the problems with Pommy lagers. And the Pils were even worse! There was nothing that wasn't disgusting. They completely destroyed the local XXXX. I discovered Fullers ESB and never looked back!
Cheers,
John K
The worst offenders are lagers on draught in the UK.
If it takes less than 5 minutes (absolute minimum) to draw a pint of lager they are doing it wrong.
Very, very wrong.
If the system is not pressurized (I haven't found a pressurized one in the UK yet) what comes out is too flat and headless besides being usually too warm.
Not quite as $$$ as Urquell.
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