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A man goes to the Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, “Are you allergic to anything?”He replies, “Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee.”
“Have you ever served in the military?”
“Yes,” he says. “I was in Iraq for two years.”
The interviewer says, “That will give you 5 extra points toward employment.”
Then he asks, “Are you disabled in any way?”
The man says, “Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles.”
The interviewer grimaces and then says, “Okay, you have enough points for me to hire you right now.”“Our hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 am. Plan on starting at 10:00 am every day.”
This puzzles the man. He asks, “If the work hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm, why do you want me here at 10:00 am?”
“This is a government job,” the interviewer says. “For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that.”
Edits: 08/19/14Follow Ups:
d
Later Gator,
Dave
It shouldn't be. The good, hard-working gov't employees know perfectly well that there's a high percentage of slackers in their midst.
You ask "How do you know?"
Glad you asked.
I took a career detour into full-time computer training as a consultant from 1985 through 1992. Often, my work also involved going to various offices to assist or advise on specific applications. About 80 percent of my work was for the Federal government, along with some for various cities and counties, and about ten percent was for private business. I can tell you, government at all levels is full of slackers doing the minimum daily requirement or less, waiting for that day when they can retire with a pension and paid health insurance. We only sometimes see it at the customer/employee interface, but it's rampant in the back offices.
I did 21 years in the Navy, worked side-by-side with GS/WS employees; (the vast majority also retired military); after I retired from the Navy I did Govt Contracting for 7 years (2 1/2 yrs in Iraq, 4 1/2 in Afghanistan).I've heard em' all and laughed at em' all; those who got uptight over em' only became fuel for more jokes.
Edits: 08/20/14 08/21/14
The Command Master Chief (yep) I worked with for nearly a year was one hard working senior. Well spoken, smart and with some wacky funny stories.
Too much is never enough
When it comes to one's job, you have to take the bad with the good and roll with the punches. I certainly don't think that joke represents the majority of government employees, any more than I think the ubiquitous lawyer jokes represent the majority of lawyers. Some of these jokes simply become part of the American fabric of pop-culture humor.
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"If you are the owner of a new stereophonic system, this record will play with even more brilliant true-to-life fidelity. In short, you can purchase this record with no fear of its becoming obsolete in the future."
A Jew an Italian and an Irishman walk into a bar.......... :-)
It's just pop culture stereotypes. Everyone knows Jews don't drink. LOL
Bill's Audio Cave
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